How knowing what you don't want reveals what you do want.
The dash in-between your birthdate and death is where your life resides. What will you make of it?"
It will always be hard to make a decision, it is innately dangerous because with each road there are benefits and liabilities. However, the worst place you can be in at any moment in life is in the in-between.
While deliberation is necessary; it is not a space to be in eternally. Before long, if you stay there, you would have experienced a worse fate than making the wrong decision. Life will have passed you by and when the end has come, you will have noticed while deliberating you forgot to live.
My mother recently battled breast cancer and while going through treatment; she became very depressed. There was significant change in her attitude and just overall outlook on life. One night while caring for her, we began talking; she told me of her childhood. Growing up in the mountainside, she would get up early before school to make hard-boiled eggs and roasted peanuts so she could sell before school.
Shortly, after school, she would head home to help her aunt she was living with around the house.
"I was a real businesswoman," she said. "I knew how to spot an opportunity." She sold fabrics on the weekend; traveling to various, cities, villages and marketplaces with her products.
In mid sentence she paused and with teary eyes, she said, "I had stopped making decisions." I was a bit confused. “You are always making choices. That’s impossible,” I said.
“One incident…,” she said “and that stopped it all.” Up until this moment she had been standing between two paths, never being courageous enough to make a decision.
In these coming months, take a little lesson from my mother and do not stop making decisions. Even in uncertainty, if you are unsure, do not allow uncertainty to paralyze you but rather let that indecisiveness be the necessary fuel to get you thinking.
This dress took me forever to complete not because I didn’t know what I wanted but because I would not make a decision on two bodice designs. But in the end I told myself it is better to pick one and see how it works, then to have a skirt bottom sitting on my dress-form for weeks without completion. So, I just choose one and you know what?— the outcome was beautiful. The pictures speak for themselves.
The answer to indecisiveness is a decision. Do not be afraid to jump head first, and if it doesn’t work, you have already eliminated one choice.
Make a decision. No choice is ever perfect but a choice is a perfect start.
What tactics have worked for you when you just can’t decide? Let me know below.
As always, Peace + Love and Great Coffee!